Waiting....

I'm not an overly impatient person, but the thought of having to wait and wait for something.....ugh. Something good, something bad. It matters not. Waiting stinks.

A few things I remember waiting for in my lifetime so far:

• A Spanking - my brother and I always got sent to our room to await whatever terrible punishment was coming our way. No matter what we had done wrong, we were "cruisin' for a bruisin'", according to our mom. If mom was the one who came in with the belt or paddle our fears were soon realized. If dad came in though, it was all we could do to contain our smile since we knew we would get off with a milder than mild pat on the behind.
• Christmas Day - we were never good at waiting. My poor parents had to search high and low to find new hiding places for our presents. They finally resorted to hiding things at other people's houses! That's when we got super smart and just started perusing the receipts in her wallet. hehehe
• Getting old enough to drive - I planned for many years that the first place I would go once I had my license was to Dairy Queen to buy my brother and me a blizzard. Sadly, that didn't happen. Wishing for a do-over now.
  
• Piano Recitals - It didn't matter how old I was, I almost always had a panic attack the closer recital day came. I could know my song forward and backward, but I still always had trouble sleeping the night before because of all the nightmares. Boy was I glad whenever recital day was over. I still occasionally have bad dreams about performing! I really do hate it.
• Getting Married - Long before I knew John, I was cutting out pictures of things I liked for a wedding. (Don't all girls do that?) I always knew I wanted to get married and have babies so I could be a mommy. At least our engagement was short. Once I knew who I was going to marry I didn't have to wait too long.

And with getting married came all kinds of waiting. Waiting for my new husband to get home from his long hours of school and work because I was lonely in our little one bedroom apartment in Dallas. Getting a job as an art teacher for K-12th and waiting desperately for the school year to be over because I hated it so much. Waiting to find out where we would move for John's first job. Kentucky? Texas? Oklahoma? Some podunk place that had a population of 7,000? Waiting to meet all the new people in our new town. Waiting to meet our precious baby boy. Waiting to see if he would have spina bifida. Waiting to proudly show him off to everyone when he did not.

Fast forward through lots more and here we are again waiting. I don't like surprises and spontaneity so very much, so not knowing where we will be in one year from now does not come easily. John told me the other day that I could make a plan for each of the likely possibilities if that would help me feel better. Sadly, it did not. The good news is that we should know within 6 months where we will be going - maybe even less than that. That's doable.

Yesterday we put in an offer on a house here. It will be a flip home that we will live in until we move. I really, really love it (as does John) and it's killing me that I have to WAIT to find out if the sellers are accepting our offer. They are asking way too much for what it is worth in its current condition and it has been on the market for quite some time. So we're hopeful that we'll be able to come to an agreeable price, BUT in the meantime......do you think I'm sleeping well? No way! I'm busy thinking through color schemes and cabinet colors and where walls should go and how our furniture (that I've missed dearly while it's all in storage) will all be arranged. And did I mention that it will have FOUR bedrooms? That's two more than we have now! So Monday - when we will probably get an answer - just can't come soon enough.

I don't like waiting one iota, but, as my brother-in-law preached just this morning, the "process" is the point. That's the time when God is really at work to prepare us for our purpose.

Our kids haven't yet learned to have much patience and I wonder if God thinks I act as ridiculous as they act when they are stamping their feet demanding something. Probably so.....probably so.